Me: Andy, I'll be right back. I have to go upstairs and throw up.
Andy: Wait Mommy! I'll go with you!!!
He did, too.
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Thursday, December 24, 2009
boing
Last night, December 23rd, we decided we couldn't take it anymore. Andy was using the furniture as a springboard, bouncing from couch to ottoman to chair to floor to dog's back....the furniture in our rumpus room is old and I want it to last through the next bouncy kid as well. Seeing as he was alive with so much toddler energy, we decided to give him his biggest present 36 hours early.
So entered the trampoline.
He was thrilled. It's a little exercise trampoline and the number of sweet, unsolicited thank-yous we've received is astounding. I didn't know he had such manners in him. He's in love with it. He asked so politely if he could bring down his pillow and blanket and sleep on his trampoline. And he bounced the hell out of it. For hours.
He'd been on his trampoline a total of 35 seconds when he fell off and landed on his face. (Way to go, parents.) And I looked at Shawn and said, "I give him one month before he figures out that he can drag it over to the couch and jump from couch to trampoline." Shawn agreed.
154 seconds later, Andy dragged his trampoline over to the couch and scaled the back of it. He stood on the top, bounced down to the cushions and onto the trampoline. And then onto the floor and his face.
So entered the trampoline.
He was thrilled. It's a little exercise trampoline and the number of sweet, unsolicited thank-yous we've received is astounding. I didn't know he had such manners in him. He's in love with it. He asked so politely if he could bring down his pillow and blanket and sleep on his trampoline. And he bounced the hell out of it. For hours.
He'd been on his trampoline a total of 35 seconds when he fell off and landed on his face. (Way to go, parents.) And I looked at Shawn and said, "I give him one month before he figures out that he can drag it over to the couch and jump from couch to trampoline." Shawn agreed.
154 seconds later, Andy dragged his trampoline over to the couch and scaled the back of it. He stood on the top, bounced down to the cushions and onto the trampoline. And then onto the floor and his face.
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
maybe next year
My Christmas talk with Andy about baby Jesus last night rapidly de-evolved into questions about whether it was possible to catch an angel in a net, from within a box, on a train.
it had to happen
Today the thumb of humiliation squashed me flat.
I had an o.b. appointment which took forever. Andy was such a good boy, so patient and well-behaved. (Clearly a switch was made and it wasn't my kid at all but an imposter.) After an hour and a half of waiting we were seen and sent downstairs to the lab. But at the hospital, before you can have anything at all done, you have to register. So we sat and waited some more. And Andy asked question after question. His little brain is a sponge, soaking up the world around him. Who am I to deny him in his quest for knowledge? I always give him an answer, though sometimes it's downright obnoxious.
When we were called back to office #3 to register, we were seated before the desk of an overly-masculine woman with very, very short hair. She was a larger lady and there wasn't much that was girly about her.
Andy looked puzzled for a moment and then pointed right at this woman and asked, "Mommy, what is that man's name?"
I stumbled, I scrounged, I grasped, but I don't think I saved it. She knew.
I had an o.b. appointment which took forever. Andy was such a good boy, so patient and well-behaved. (Clearly a switch was made and it wasn't my kid at all but an imposter.) After an hour and a half of waiting we were seen and sent downstairs to the lab. But at the hospital, before you can have anything at all done, you have to register. So we sat and waited some more. And Andy asked question after question. His little brain is a sponge, soaking up the world around him. Who am I to deny him in his quest for knowledge? I always give him an answer, though sometimes it's downright obnoxious.
When we were called back to office #3 to register, we were seated before the desk of an overly-masculine woman with very, very short hair. She was a larger lady and there wasn't much that was girly about her.
Andy looked puzzled for a moment and then pointed right at this woman and asked, "Mommy, what is that man's name?"
I stumbled, I scrounged, I grasped, but I don't think I saved it. She knew.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
schna!
This morning we woke up to a beautiful white snowfall. I was up most of the night watching it come down, so I was really excited to show Andy when he woke up. As soon as I heard him stirring at 7:20 a.m. I went into his room, got down on his bed and said, "Andy I have a surprise for you!"
He woke right up and said, "What is it, Mommy?"
I said, "Look out the window!"
He got out of his covers, stood up, and went over to his window. He pulled back his blinds and saw the beautiful scene.
I asked, "What do you think, Andy?"
He smiled and said, "I smell poop!"
He woke right up and said, "What is it, Mommy?"
I said, "Look out the window!"
He got out of his covers, stood up, and went over to his window. He pulled back his blinds and saw the beautiful scene.
I asked, "What do you think, Andy?"
He smiled and said, "I smell poop!"
Thursday, December 17, 2009
guffaw
Just a moment ago, while repeatedly blasting the horn on his garbage truck toy....
"Listen Mommy! I hear something horny!"
"Listen Mommy! I hear something horny!"
the funniest
On school mornings, 3 days a week, I have a lot to accomplish. I have to get myself ready and Andy ready and breakfasted and out the door with his father. Shawn has a bit of a tendency to sleep in as late as possible, so I've found a way around that. At 7:30 I wake up my son and he generally bounces out of bed. I hug him and send him into our bedroom to wake up his father. Andy opens the door, barges in loudly, and proceeds to take Booba, his little bunny, and whack his father on the butt several times. He then climbs onto the bed and beats Shawn from the other side.
Now, because Shawn never reads my blogs I can reveal this: this is all my doing. Andy didn't think of this Booba-butt-beating thing on his own. I remind him every morning to go in and 'beat Daddy on the butt with Booba until he wakes up'. Shawn thinks it's all Andy's idea so he doesn't mind too much. He thinks it's a cute I-love-Daddy thing. But I always stand in the doorway and laugh myself stupid.
This morning Andy went in and whacked his father a few times on the rump. Then he turned to me in the dim light and said, "Mommy, which side is the butt on?" I told him that Daddy's butt was facing the other way, so he climbed up on the bed and started beating Shawn from the other direction. Then he got under the covers and ooched up next to his father.
When he did this, Shawn started to wake up. He let out a big, manly yawn complete with some icky throat noises.
And Andy said, "Awww, Daddy, you're disgusting!"
Now, because Shawn never reads my blogs I can reveal this: this is all my doing. Andy didn't think of this Booba-butt-beating thing on his own. I remind him every morning to go in and 'beat Daddy on the butt with Booba until he wakes up'. Shawn thinks it's all Andy's idea so he doesn't mind too much. He thinks it's a cute I-love-Daddy thing. But I always stand in the doorway and laugh myself stupid.
This morning Andy went in and whacked his father a few times on the rump. Then he turned to me in the dim light and said, "Mommy, which side is the butt on?" I told him that Daddy's butt was facing the other way, so he climbed up on the bed and started beating Shawn from the other direction. Then he got under the covers and ooched up next to his father.
When he did this, Shawn started to wake up. He let out a big, manly yawn complete with some icky throat noises.
And Andy said, "Awww, Daddy, you're disgusting!"
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