busted

Andy: Mommy, are you eating a muffin in that picture?

Me, deciding to be honest: No, I'm smoking a cigar in that photo. It was a long time ago.

Andy, shocked: You're smoking?! [irritated sigh and disapproving look] Do I have to tell you this every day?

stalling

Award-winning stall job by my son tonight.

Me: Andy, why are you down here and not in bed?

Andy: Well, uh.....uh......[idea hits and he runs with it]....It's just, you're in my heart and so is Daddy.

art lesson

Today we were watching an episode of "Little Einsteins". They feature an artist and a composer on each episode.

When they announced the artist of the day, Andy said excitedly, "Hey! That's my name! Except I'm Andy Roberts and he's Andy Warthog."

he may be right

"Mommy, maybe Ben should go to juvie instead of preschool."

precisely

Andy ran his car across the basement floor and crashed, despite my warnings. He fell and split his lip open and it bled pretty heavily.

After the screaming and bleeding subsided, he came back to the basement and began to run his car again, at full speed.

I mumbled, "Guess you didn't learn your lesson, did you?"

He asked, "What lesson?"

Exactly.

in tights

Me, to Ben: You're such a manly little man.

Andy: Are you talking to me, Mommy?

Me: No, honey. I'm talking to Ben.

Andy: Am I a manly man?

Me: Yes, you are both my manly little men.

Andy: So...we're menly mens.

happy together

Andy: I'm going to marry my own butt.