humiliation, party of 3

Whenever we're in an airport waiting for a flight, we usually try to run Andy as much as possible, knowing that he'll have to sit relatively still for at least two hours on the plane. On this most recent trip he was a wonderful traveler.

Nonetheless, we ran him hard at the Pittsburgh airport prior to boarding. Actually, he ran us pretty hard. We generally take turns following him around the terminal as he runs in circles and loops around all the other passengers in the waiting area. Sometimes he trips over people and often he's so excited that he makes his hyper monkey noise, but he's never yet failed to amuse the masses of waiting adults. There is always laughter and adoration as people watch him race around and around, and there's generally a bit of laughter at whichever parent is chasing him.

As luck would have it, I was doing the chasing when he decided to slow down and take a look out the window at our airplane. There was a delightful older couple, about my parents' age, sitting next to the window and the lady took a bit of a shining to Andy and began to talk to him.

"What's your name?"
"Where are you flying?"
"Who's that on your tennis shoes?" (Thomas the Train, of course.)

Andy was very articulately answering this lady and they were having a rousing conversation when all of a sudden.....Andy cut the cheese.

He looked at me and began to giggle. There was no doubt in my mind that this lady both heard and understood what had just occurred. I'm sure I turned beet red, but I managed to say, "Andy, please say excuse me honey."

He did. And the lady, bless her soul, continued on with the conversation as though this little boy in front of her hadn't just ripped the world's loudest toddler fart.

"Do you like to run around?"
"Do you like school?"
"Are you going to play on the beach?"

TOOT!

He did it again. The little stinker ripped another one, even louder than the first. This time he didn't just giggle; he guffawed. He cackled at himself.

His laughter was almost as loud as the toot had been. This time the lady closed her mouth and just stared, as did the twenty other people in the immediate vicinity. I looked across the crowd to Shawn, who was slinking down in his chair in utter hysterics. I discreetly pointed to him and indicated that this was all his fault.

I pulled my little Gassy Gus out of there and back to his father. Andy was still chuckling about his fart. My face was hellaciously red and the humiliation was physically palpable in my gut. It was the most embarrassing moment of my entire life, I think.